As an immigrant from Panama who is an Afro-Latino Caribbean man, I brought two prejudices: homophobia and sexism. This is how I eradicated those diseases from my being.
How overcame my homophobia and sexism
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The path to overcoming deep-seated prejudices is often long and requires more than mere intellectual acknowledgment. Prejudices such as homophobia and sexism are embedded in the cultural fabric of many societies, making them difficult to unlearn. But with dedication, self-reflection, and a willingness to confront personal biases, it is possible to break free from these harmful attitudes.
My personal journey of overcoming homophobia and sexism was not easy. Coming from a Central American background, I was exposed to cultural beliefs that framed homosexuality and certain expressions of gender as abominations. These ideas, pervasive in many societies, create a sense of fear, shame, and otherness that is difficult to shake off even after intellectually rejecting such notions. My transformation began with an intellectual shift initiated by a business partner who challenged my rationalization of my prejudices. The intellectual shift in thinking was only the first step.
A Politics Done Right listener and PDR Posse member asked me to play a video of a young woman making an important point that triggered me to make the included video. The speaker in that video had a prescient message: “Even if you can change somebody’s mind at a factual level, that initial emotional residue tends to stick around.” This “emotional residue” refers to the lingering feelings and reactions that are not easily discarded. It’s one thing to understand that homophobia and sexism are wrong, but it’s another to eradicate the physical and emotional responses that have been conditioned over years or decades.
Even after my transformation, I felt discomfort around gay men despite intellectually accepting them as equals and becoming an activist for LGBTQ+ rights. This discomfort was tied not only to homophobia but also to sexism. While I had no problem hugging gay women, hugging gay men or expressing affection for them caused a visceral reaction. This illustrates the complex intersection of homophobia and sexism, where traditional notions of masculinity play a significant role in shaping prejudices.
Changing my deep-seated biases required intentional effort. I actively worked to challenge my emotional reactions, forcing myself to hug gay men and embrace a new understanding of what it meant to love and accept others, regardless of their sexual orientation. Over time, these actions helped to align my emotional responses with my intellectual beliefs, leading to a true transformation.
One of the most significant takeaways from this story is the recognition that overcoming prejudice is not just about changing minds—it’s about changing hearts and bodies. We must emphasize the importance of engaging with the people and ideas that challenge one’s biases, even when uncomfortable. This is especially true for those who identify as progressive but still harbor subconscious prejudices. You have a lot of progressives that…are intellectually not racist, and they’re intellectually not sexist, and they’re intellectually not homophobic. The gap between intellectual belief and emotional or subconscious bias can manifest in actions as significant as political choices.
For those looking to overcome their culture-induced prejudices, let’s be clear. It has to be intentional. Simply saying “I’m not racist” or “I’m not homophobic” is not enough. It requires active, ongoing engagement with the people and issues you may have been conditioned to fear or misunderstanding. You must “make that concerted effort to change not just your mind but your physical reaction to that which you were prejudiced against.”
One of the most powerful aspects of my transformation is the freedom that comes with overcoming these biases and prejudices. It allows one to interact with people of all identities without the emotional baggage of prejudice: “The freedom you get from being able to see these things and not have a gut reaction…you would not imagine what it feels like.” This freedom allows for a deeper, more genuine connection with others and a clearer understanding of shared humanity.
I wrote an easy-to-read book titled “Tribulations of an Afro-Latino Caribbean Man: Racism Didn’t Stop My Smile, Hope, Or, Journey Forward,” which is worth reading. All paid subscribers to my “Egberto Off The Record” newsletter can immediately read that book and all my other and future books. For those who prefer a hard copy of the book, please get it here.
For those grappling with their prejudices—whether about race, gender, sexuality, or other aspects of identity—there is hope. It is possible to unlearn harmful attitudes, but it requires more than passive acknowledgment. It requires action, reflection, and a willingness to be uncomfortable. Most importantly, it requires a commitment to personal growth, not just for the sake of oneself but for the betterment of society.
If you want to overcome prejudices, you have to be intentional. This message resonates in today’s world, where surface-level progress often masks deeper, unresolved biases. True equality, humanity, and progress can only be achieved when individuals take the initiative to confront and overcome their prejudices, creating a society where everyone is seen and treated as equals.
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